Thursday, October 31, 2024

THE MUMMY AND THE CURSE OF THE JACKALS (1969)

 "IT WAS I WHO SAVED YOU FROM THE LAKE, AND ME TO WHOM YOU WILL SHOW YOUR GRATITUDE . . . AND GIVE YOUR LOVE." 


Oliver Drake was a B-Western director and he made a whole passel of 'em.  Then he made one and only one horror movie.  And he never finished it.  And this is what we have here amongst us today.  Lensed in Las Vegas, with what looks like absolutely no budget and containing absolutely every single Mummy movie cliche you can list -- and a good amount of werewolf movie cliches as well.  I cannot believe Anthony Eisley said yes to starring in this movie.  I can readily believe John Carradine did because he'd appear in anything for a paycheck.  Eisley is archeologist David Barrie who is studying the mummy of Princess Akana (Marliza Pons).  Well, she ain't a mummy exactly.  She's more like a Vegas showgirl lying in a coffin with a glass top to it. 

I wasn't aware that ancient Egypt had discovered glass-making and neither was David Barring; thankfully he does bring up that little historical anomaly and quickly puts it out of his mind.  Next to Akana in the coffin next door is an actual mummy named Sirak (Saul Goldsmith) of who was in love with Akana in life and, when he tried to steal her body, had his tongue ripped out and was wrapped in mummy cloth and buried alive.  Does all this sound familiar?  See THE MUMMY (1932), Hammer's THE MUMMY as well as BLOOD OF THE MUMMY'S TOMB and practically every other Mummy movie out there.  David locks himself in the -- what is it, lab? museum? basement??? -- because the legend says that whomever is in the presence of the Princess Akana during the full moon will suffer the "curse of the jackals".  So before you know it, the moon is up and David lap-dissolves into a -- what??? -- were-jackal??? -- and his makeup/mask is just the cutest thang!!!!! 

Were-David goes outside (suddenly he's not locked in anymore) and wanders around for a while not doing much then returns back inside and falls asleep.  Oh wait, he kills a couple of cops and rips their throats out.  Yeah, there was that.  Anyway, the next morning ole David's got a pretty bad hangover.  He then narrates a flashback which is lifted absolutely from aforesaid THE MUMMY (1932) etc. This is so great there's absolutely no attempt to change the old story of High Priest Imhotep and Princess Anck-es-en-amun.  Perhaps Oliver Drake was way ahead of his time and this is actually a 'reboot'????  Well, that's how I'm lookin' at it, anyway.  The next night David furs-out again (he's so cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute) and encounters a drunk resting under a tree.  The drunk hears David growling and says "Here, doggie.  You want a drink?" 

This is Shakespeare country, y'all!  The drunken hobo wanders off into the wind-tossed night and breaks into David's place. . . to the accompaniment of sitar music (for no other reason than it's 1969, I guess) followed by what sounds like B-western music and then back to the sitar again.  I guess the director had a deal on library music?!?!?!  Perhaps.  I mean, there's surf guitar music and psychedelic 60's rock and Larry Ferrari organ music and who knows what all kinds of music heard during this movie. It's great! Were-David comes in and is not too thrilled about the bobo being there so he attacks.  Unfortunately (or fortunately for us), during the struggle Akana's glass coffin is smashed and the hobo runs away.  Were-David tries to chase after him but the hobo has scarpered.  And Akana is now revivified!  She's now up-and-at-'em and very grateful to David for rescuing her from the lake and promises that later they will have time for "other things".  Nik Nik????  Oh yeah!!!  David goes to the local dress shop to buy Akana an outfit and they get invited on a double date with David's friend Bob (Robert Alan Browne) for a steak dinner.  Meanwhile, left alone, Akana revives her mummy friend but not before David has to teach Akana how to work a brassiere.  David and Akana (whom he's now calling Connie Adams) show up for their steak dinner with Bob and Donna at a bar/restaurant which I SWEAR is the exact same red-walled joint that Jack Palance goes to 4 years later in CRAZE!  It's just gotten be.  It's all one universe, I'm tellin' ya!!!!  While they're out, Sirak the mummy pops out of his mummy case and goes out on the town.  Maybe he wants a steak dinner too?  I'm sorry but this is a great mummy!  Especially when he claws the mummy rags off his eyes so he can see.  Later, when the Mummy attacks a Vegas showgirl, she reaches up and claws the wrappings off his other eye and reveals an awesome big googley eyeball!   Oh yes, and originality is still out the window as Sirak walks dragging his leg a la Lon Chaney Jr.'s Kharis mummy movies!  Of course, there may be a good reason for that since director Oliver Drake was actually associate producer on one of those very Chaney Jr. mummy movies: Universal's THE MUMMY'S CURSE!  Meanwhile back at the steak dinner, Connie/Akana has a cobra ring which sparkles with kaleidoscopic colour effects.  I now take back what I said about this movie having no budget.  This is great stuff!!!  It had at least SOME budget.       

Once again, I'm led to believe this could possibly be the best movie ever made!  All the reviews and ratings for this flick are absolutely terrible; giving the film a 1 star (or even half star) rating.  I honestly don't know what's wrong with people; they've got no sense of fun.  After all, this movie is about 18 billion times better than the abyssmal THE HOWLING II, fer corn's sake!!!   

No comments:

Post a Comment