THE SECRET OF THE LOCH {1934}

 CREAKY CRYPTOID!!! 

This is an old favourite of mine which probably no one else will have a soft spot for but I gives no cares!  The truth of the matter is that the film features all the hallmarks of a very early British sound filml a creakiness and lack of pace accompanied by mostly bland characters and overly-theatrical dialogue.  But it also remains true that it's probably the very first film about the Loch Ness monster (at least in the sound era, certainly) and it now and again has some very effective moments which make me have a lot of time for this one.  I do understand that, for most people, it will probably be a bit of a chore to get through; despite being only 78 minutes long.

The film opens with a scared-looking fella running down a dark, foggy road at night.  Actually he's running in place PRETENDING to run.  Aw, bless!  He runs into the pub shouting that he's seen the monster.  Miscellaneous bar conversation erupts about whether or not Nessie is real when crotchedy Professor Heggie (Seymour Hicks) comes in with his kilted "manservant" Angus (Gibson Gowland).  The professor is sure that Nessie is real and he can prove it!  Suffering ridicule amongst his learned collegues in London, Heggie has ensconced himself in his Scottish castle and is planning to send a diver down to find the monster.  Intrepid reporter Jimmy Andrews (Frederick Peisley) annoys the hell out of the professor in London then follows him to Scotland where he annoys the hell out of him there.  While climbing into a castle window at night, he accidentally enters the bedroom of the professor's daughter Angela (Nancy O'Neil).  Both are immediately smitten with each other (as happens in these movies) but Jimmy is soon discovered and tossed from the castle. 

Later, a professional diver arrives and submerges into the dark waters of the loch.  The signal is eventually given to pull him up (this is the old-fashioned diving gear where men manually work the air pump through a hose).  Suddenly the hose goes slack.  The men pull it up to reveal it has been cut . . . . or bitten through.  No more diver.  Professor Heggie is put on trial for recklessly endangering the diver's life with faulty diving equipment.  The Prof insists that it was Nessie that got him.  Jimmy the reported tries to help the professor's case by insisting he's right about the monster but Heggie, still royally teed-off at the reporter, will have none of his help.  An exasperated Jimmy, now in Angela's bad books too, decides that he is going to dive in the loch and prove that the professor is right -- there IS a Nessie!

THE SECRET OF THE LOCH is a movie that I've been watching since probably the early 90's when I got a VHS from Greg Luce's superb Sinister Cinema.  As I said, I've always had a soft spot for it even though it's not a great film.  For this rewatch, I screened the magnificent-looking print on THE EALING STUDIOS RARITIES COLLECTION VOLUME 4 dvd and the film looks better than I've ever seen it look.  Of course, this shows up the film's frequent use of rear-projection more but HEY this is a film from 1934.  So what.  The performances are, without exception, stagey and overly-theatrical but HEY it's a film from 1934 and I don't mind that in the least. 

The Loch Ness Monster, when we finally see it . . . and we DO get to see it against all expectations . . . it a back-projected lizard a la countless 50's dinosaur movies.  And it works.  Actually it's done with more success than something like KILLERS FROM SPACE decades later!  There are many, MANY parts where the film lags but before too long an atmospheric nighttime shot (and there are many nighttime scenes) ramps up the atmosphere enough to keep at least ME interested.  If you're in a very lenient mood, THE SECRET OF THE LOCH can be a fun watch.