SUBURBAN SASQUATCH {2004}

 "OK, WELL YOU KNOW MONSTERS DON'T REALLY EXIST.  WHY DON'T YOU GO OUT AND PLAY.  MONSTERS AREN'T REAL; LIKE THE BOOGEYMAN OR YOUR FATHER.  THEY'RE NOT REALLY THERE."

  Q:  What's better than a Bigfoot movie on the Countdown to Halloween?  A:  TWO Bigfoot movies on the Countdown to Halloween!

And here we have a SOV Bigfoot movie (not a found footage movie, thankfully).  The only difference between SUBURBAN SASQUATCH and any late 80's-90's SOV horror movie is the better video/audio quality on this 2004 flick; it looks like it was shot on digital rather than VHS.  The beautiful, slipcovered edition from Visual Vengeance/Wild Eye is something I'm sure the filmmakers never dreamed would come into existence.  But I, for one, am thankful it has.  Unlike many SOV horror movies, there are some bon mots scattered throughout; that quote up above which opens this post, for instance, is what a mother tells her frightened son after he glimpses the killer Sasquatch in the yard.  The glorious special effects of of the BIRDEMIC variety and Sasquatch his or herself (those sculpted nipples leave me guessing) is a full costume with everything except a visible zipper up the back.  The goofiness of the kills is also very much appreciated by this trashy movie fan.  Two fisherman by a stream are accosted by our furry movie star -- the first guy gets his guts ripped out and fed to him by the Sasquatch

. . . then it rips his arm off and whales it at the second fisherman and knocks him into the water.  Brilliant choreography Hermes Pan would've loved.  Sasquatch's roar is a thing of perfection:  RaaaraaaRAAAAR RaaraaRAAAAR!!!  I need it now as my ringtone.  Interestingly, about halfway through the movie, the Sasquatch seems to suddenly gain the ability to teleport or something.  This ain't no ordinary Bigfoot; this is a magical beast!  It can alter reality and walk between the planes of existence.  Don't take MY word for it . . . . Talla says so.    

And I'm not in anyway taking the piss out of this flick.  All this I've mentioned, of course, indicates that SUBURBAN SASQUATCH is certainly a bad movie; and it IS with terrible acting and SPFX that look like they were done on a Commodore 64.  But all this makes for a hell of an entertaining movie.  As long as you go into it with the proper attitude.  Uptight viewers who can't see the charm of such a film and the erstwhile effort involved in creating a zero budget, amateur horror movie need not waste their time.  But this here viewer enjoyed the hell out of this one!  Of course, this is no ordinary Sasquatch; it likes to eat it's victims.  And there are more arms and legs flying through the air than you can count. 

Plus we have a kickass hero in Talla:  a Native American bow-slinging warrior princess (played nicely by Sue Lynn Shanchez) who grandfather sends her on a sacred mission to protect innocent victims from the savage suburban sasquatch.  For an amateur production, this is actually shooting above it's level.  Director Dave Wascavage (who also wrote, edited and photographed the film) shows some talent -- ESPECIALLY with the pacing which doesn't bog down like some other SOV productions.  Wascavage keeps the action occurring with a frequency that prevents boredom from setting in.  The cast of non-actors are also strangely endearing and I kinda loved them all -- even the unnamed Sasquatch fodder.  Points given also for the autumnal atmosphere; the ground is perpetually covered with fallen leaves giving it a September or, dare I say it, OCTOBER atmosphere.  Filmed in the wilds of West Chester, Pennsylvania, SUB SAS features scenes occurring a various fields which really reminded me of similar scenes occurring in the B&W fields of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD.  Honestly, there's just so much to love about this little flick.  Wascavage and his motley crew have made a movie that is deliberately meant to be a lot of fun and doesn't take itself seriously.  And that is what makes this such a great watch.  Predictably (and perhaps fittingly), there is a Rifftrax version of SUBURBAN SASQUATCH which nicely appears on the blu ray's special features.  I haven't watched that yet but I will sometime in the future.  But yeah . . . . Talla kicks ass!!!  Finally, if I had to choose one word to describe SUBURBAN SASQUATCH is would be:  lovable.