Thursday, October 15, 2020

THE DARK, EVIL, HORRIFYING SECRET BEHIND THE BRADY BUNCH

 I AM GOING TO TAKE YOU NOW ON A STRANGE, LOOPY AND TERRIFYING JOURNEY THROUGH THE LAND OF CLASSIC TV WHITEBREAD.  We all grew up watching THE BRADY BUNCH reruns (and if you didn't, what the HELL is wrong witcha?!?!?!?) but even such a seemingly innocuous series can have dark underpinnings which prove that Halloween infiltrates EVERYTHING!  I refer here to the three-part storyline when the Brady family went on vacation in Hawaii:  episodes # 72-74. 


We all remember that in the first episode "HAWAII BOUND", Bobby finds a tiki idol at a construction site and immediately bad luck starts to befall members of the family:  a big green metal "leaf" falls off the wall and almost hits Bobby, Alice throws her back out learning to hula dance,

a tarantula attacks,

a ukulele gets sat upon and, most famously, Greg wipes out while surfing. 

Convinced that the tiki idol is cursed, Bobby and the boys decide to return it to the burial cave to end the "curse".  Then, as we all remember, the boys are held captive in the cave

by a crazed Professor Whitehead (played by immortal actor and patron-saint of the Countdown to Halloween Vincent Price). 

Being an early 70's, family-friendly sitcom which tries to wrap the plot up with a happy ending, Professor Whitehead becomes friendly and is invited to a luau with the family and the curse is brought to a tidy end.

Or was it?


I, for one, say NO!  The supernatural is not so easily cowed and the Countdown to Halloween is not so easily thwarted.  The evil continued and followed the Brady's home and continued to exert an evil influence on them until the show's eventual cancellation.  Why?  Because, if you remember or go back and watch, the Tiki Idol had a name given to it by crazy Prof. Whitehead.  Vincent Price calls the Tiki Idol "Oliver".  


Oliver.  Yes, that's right.  The shiver-inducing name of the "cute cousin" the show brought in to "increase ratings" and which is the moment it is universally agreed upon that THE BRADY BUNCH jumped the shark.  There was no "Cousin Oliver".  It was that damn cursed Tiki Idol Oliver masquerading as a "cute kid to increase ratings" which, in fact, torpedoed the show and led to it's cancellation.  You may recall there was even one episode where "Cousin Oliver" believed he was a jinx who caused bad luck; Oliver was just playing with the Bradys now!!!  This evil tiki idol was pretending to be "Cousin Oliver" in order to get the show cancelled and to wreak his vengeance on THE BRADY BUNCH.  And when he had succeeded, Tiki Idol/Cousin Oliver receded back into the misty night to plot and plan further evil deeds.  And he is ESPECIALLY active during the spooky Halloween month of October . . . .looking for unwary fools, who never watched THE BRADY BUNCH, on whom to cast his evil influence.  So if you ever see a little kid trick-or-treating, who has glasses and a blonde bowl-cut, RUN!!!!!!  

2 comments:

Bob Johns said...

Poor Oliver! But I still love that Hawian Vacation Episode.

Caffeinated Joe said...

Always loved when that saga would air in the rerun rotation as a kid. Good stuff!