Monday, April 30, 2007
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Friday, April 27, 2007
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Monday, April 16, 2007
"Here I bring in light and earth from the North to brighten our circle and make it strong." -- says he. . .the one with the "C" on his hat. . .and that "C" don't stand for "Campbells".
Yeah, and that was AFTER he burned the floor with charcoal.
Hmmm. . . methinks maybe I'll have to transfer this to a DVD. . .now that I can DO that.
Also, please notice the wonderful retouching I've done to the accompanying picture. I don't have the capacity to upload photos from a videotape source so this is my best approximation at a photographic recreation of the original scene.
Friday, April 13, 2007
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Monday, April 09, 2007
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Friday, April 06, 2007
Thursday, April 05, 2007
20) The Princess Bride -- It boggles my mind how so many people rave about this movie. It's not funny, it's not charming, it's not entertaining, it's not fun -- it's dreary and seems MUCH longer than it actually is. This looks like what a friend of mine calls a "lunchtime production"; that is, some Hollywood folks had a lunch hour with nothing to do so they made this film.
21) Beat the Devil -- This so-called classic is a sad attempt to recapture past glories and tarnishes the reputation of so many truly talented people it's mind-boggling. Directed by John Huston, co-written by Truman Capote, starring Humphrey Bogart, Jennifer Jones, Peter Lorre, and Robert Morley (in the Sidney Greenstreet part), everyone looks tired and washed out (due in no small part to the incredibly ugly, washed-out photography of Oswald Morris). This is not Casablanca and it's not the Maltese Falcon; why is everyone pretending that it is. Sad and not entertaining.
22) Funny Face -- the only movie I can think of that managed to make both Fred Astaire AND Audrey Hepburn tedious and uninteresting.
23) The Greatest Show On Earth -- this "Best Picture of the Year" Oscar winner is a bore-a-thon of the worst order. Cecil B. DeMille instills every negative directorial quirk he's ever had while an all-star cast stumbles around with little idea what they're supposed to do. When the train derails, one only wishes it had crushed the film itself instead of the circus animals. Every other film nominated for "Best Picture" that year was ROBBED!
24) They Drive By Night -- this film is sometime mistakenly called film noir (Oh boy, it ain't!) and stars Humphrey Bogart and George Raft in a movie about truckers. Yes, believe it or not, it's even LESS interesting than that sounds. I swear the film is actually 6 hours long; it sure SEEMS that way. This is duller than watching baseball, watching golf OR watching farming. The golden age of Hollywood lost it's lustre on this one!
25) The Wrong Man -- Alfred Hitchcock is such a phenomenal director that I can't let this one sneak by without stabbing at it. Henry Fonda stars in this very un-Hitchcockian Hitchcock film about an innocent man on the run for a crime he didn't commit. Sounds like Hitchcock, I hear you say. Yes, it does. Then why, oh why, did Hitch decide to film it as a bland police procedural with absolutely NO Hitchcock touches and absolutely NO Hitchcock suspense. The only suspense caused by THIS movie is whether your heart will stop from sheer boredom. Even a master stumbles; here's where Hitchcock did.
26) 2001: A Space Odyssey. This is without doubt one of the most over-rated, self-indulgent, yawn-inducing steaming turd of a movie ever made. Again. . .not a Kubrick fan. Can you tell. The ENDLESS, interminable long shots on spaceships and space stations would try anyone's patience; a PROPER director would have realized that special effects quickly become outdated and surpassed so one shouldn't leave the camera on a model of a space station for 20 SOLID MINUTES!!! People jumping around in monkey suits? FASCINATING!!! Endless, pointless psychedelic light shows taking up the final third of the film. Now THAT'S storytelling! Arthur C. Clarke couldn't find the slightest vestige of his book in the movie. Neither could we.
So OK, that's my ranting and raving about the movies everyone else loves but I hate. I know my loyal readers MUST have there own list (I can hear Finky sharpening up his pencils for Sunset Blvd even as we speak). SO let's spit some venom and hurl some vitriol, people!