Tuesday, December 18, 2007

CERPTS THAT LIVE EVEN FARTHER IN THE PAST -- SO FAR THAT THE DINOSAURS WERE WEARING HUGGIES. OK, direct from the Twilight Zone are some pictures of me -- jeez, talk about the ghost of Christmas Past -- the first picture is of me and my first little girlfriend. I was 6 and she was 5. And yes, we did live in Stepford. I briefly toyed with the idea of putting one of those black bars across our eyes (or at least hers since my face has been in every post office from here to Hoboken) but I figured screw it -- she went and married a plumber so the hell with 'er! Please note the 70's wood panelling and mustard-coloured drapes. Also note that practically every ornament you see on that tree can be seen this very moment on my Christmas tree. Hey, isn't that that strange billiard game Don Adams advertised???
The second picture is of me the same day (it appears) in the same shirt and I seem to be very excited to get a red bike. Actually, I don't remember getting this bike at all. I remember getting a blue bike when I was older but not this one. Perhaps I in fact stole it from another child. That would explain my obvious glee. Oh and yes, my mother was Jackie Kennedy. And please note it looks like I'm ALMOST wearing Chuckies! Probably some cheap knockoffs available in the shade of the maple. These pictures were obviously taken with non-digital cameras of the early 70's so the 3 sixes on my scalp aren't visible.

6 comments:

Cheekies said...

Oh, these pictures would be right around the time you lost your virginity. This is either right before or right after. My, you two did make a lovely couple. You say she married a plummer? He gets to snake her drain on a regular basis.

Cheekies said...

Those mustard curtais are th xact sam nes I just threw out at Faere's mothers house. And yes, they eere being used when I threw them out, not packed away in a basement.

Cerpts said...

You need to ask Santa for a new keyboard, doddy. Prrrrrrrronto!

Cerpts said...

No, that is not about the time I lost my virginity. That was way 5 years later. This is just the girl I got naked.

And yes, if she is still married to the plumber (it's been about a decade since updates on this subject) I'm sure he's just beating her.

And I was wondering who bought those mustard curtains all those years ago.

And I suggest you don't make TOO much fun of my pictures because. . . there are some photos of YOU that I could put up here as well. I'll just mention three words: race car shorts.

Cheekies said...

I need to have those pictures destroyed. And you are so right about the keyboad.

Cerpts said...

Keyboad?!?!?